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I really need to finish this fucking program!!!





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Monday, January 20, 2003

Let's see....overall, today I got about %15 of all the homework I'm scheduled to do this weekend. At this point, I planned on having %50 completed but I got distracted. I've got a short attention span. We're out of school tomorrow (a.k.a. today), so I've got another day to get it done. I need to do laundry, and clean up my half of the room, and play some video games, and pick up my crap at the post office. Also, I need to take out half the money I've got in my account and mail it to my parents. I'm not totally feeling good with money orders. I don't like the idea of giving a store over 1000 dollars, and then mailing that money order off to my parents. I've got to talk to them again about it. There's go to be a better way. Maybe I can deposit it directly into their account(s). Whatever, I'll figure it out later.

This is going to be the longest span of months where I didn't see my parents. They dropped me off Jan 7th, and I'm not going to see them until March 2nd. So this is going to be interesting. I'm really missing them, I'm just missing my room (once again). I miss my bed most of all! He's the order of things I miss about my room:
1. my perfect junior-sized bed
2. my privacy...I can't lock the dooor and I'm not sharing it with a [somewhat] stranger
3. my dual computer setup...I hook my iBook and iMac up together, and network those bitches!
4. did I already say privacy?
5. the ability to stay up as long as I fucking want to!!!! I'm an all nighter kind of person! On average, I go to bed around 3:30AM everyday regardless of how early I've got to wake up. With a roommate, and crap, that opportunity isn't there.
6. it's huge!!! My room is as big as my dorm room (minus the bathroom). If I wanted to, I could roll around in the floor. (I've done it before.)
7. oh, ....and PRIVACY!

Well, it's time to buckle-up because it's time to finally take off with this studying and doing homework gimmick I said I was going to do. I hate making these expectations for myself, and not fulfilling them. It's like I'm lie-ing to myself. I've made a deal with myself: I'll only lie to everyone except me. I need some chapstick. Awwwwwww, that feels good. You know, there's nothing that feels better than putting chapstick on your lips after they're dry as hell. It's so rewarding and stimulating and stuff. (Of course there's better things, but I had to make a point.) Hey!!!!! Check out that metrod theme techno remix in my file sharing folder. It's pretty cool. I like techno. It's just interesting to discover how different chord progressions can make you feel a certain way. Techno is more than bass beating chaos. It really is an art. If you didn't realize it, analyze the fucker then. You'll see. Of course you'll need to know how to analyze music....sorry, I can't help you out there. It's better than that feel good optimistic trying to innovate but really imitating that 70s "I'm high" vibe by using acoustics along with the mellow drummer and also with lyrics that feature fucked up metaphors like, "you're body is a wonderland" bullshit. I know I know, that's a run on sentence. Of course all lyrics have metaphors, but not "fucked up" ones...lol. I swear, music is going downhill!! I can't wait until my ass is out there in the music industry. Oh yeah, I'm coming. And I'm not going to be the stereotypical black rapper, oh no. Honestly, I don't know what the hell my genre's going to be. It's going to be whatever makes me feel real. Fuck that feel good bullshit, it's all about feeling real.

Um....I really need a piano in my room. Not a keyboard, a piano!!! I miss touching keys that actually have weight to them. I want to play in an orchestra w/ my trombone. I'm sleepy. My definition of a "hippy" is changed forever all because of college. My definition for a lot of words have changed...including bitch, crap, roommate, pimp, and coont. Roommate is the anonym for privacy, lol. Roommate can also mean the Anti-Christ, depending on your mood. Bitch doesn't mean a dumb fucked up girl anymore ...it means "women." Crap isn't what comes out of your ass, it's what you say that expresses frustration. Pimp is what you call a guy living in an environment where the women rule over the men 4:1. Coont is just a funny way of saying cunt.
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