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Tuesday, September 30, 2003
I feel like an adult now...fuck!
¶6:31 PM
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Sunday, September 28, 2003 ....oh well. It's great when you don't really care. Who really cares when you think about it. I wish I didn't have to care. But, diplomacy is what makes the world go around. Diplomacy and Small Talk. I especially love the feeling of paranoia...when someone's standing behind. That's when things get tricky. Tricky tricky tricky... Who fucking cares. I do. What's trickier than paranoia? Fucking shit. Who fucking cares about "fucking shit." I don't care. I wish more people didn't care. Why should I speak about something I'm passionate about to someone who could care less? It doesn't make sense. There's no fucking logic. What is the world to do. ¶12:43 AM e-mail me (0) comments Thursday, September 25, 2003  Do I really have to say anything? ¶9:47 AM e-mail me (0) comments Tuesday, September 23, 2003 I was such a hypocrite last year. Damn. I just realized that. I feel so dirty now. Being contradictory is what being human is all about. No other animal in the world does it....well, maybe parakeets. They chirp like they're happy and want company. The moment you come near them or try to pet them, they SCREAM and try to bite you. Maybe that's just my personal experience. Damn parakeets and humans with their contradictory asses. ¶3:11 PM e-mail me (0) comments Monday, September 22, 2003 Woo motherfucking hoo. I got awakened at 7AM in the fucking morning! YAhoooooo! It took me about 30 minutes to get back to sleep. I was having the most delightful dream. I was outside having a picnic with the girl from Birds of Prey (the girl who was Colin Farrell's girl in S.W.A.T.), and she was caressing my upper thigh. She was petting my crotch when I heard my roommate's alarm clock, "EHEHEHHEHHEHHHHHH, EHEHEHHHEHEHEHEHEHEHTYTHEHEHE, EHEHEHEHEHEHEEHJ, EHEHEHEHEHHHEEEEEEHHEHEEH". DAMMIT! Fuck. The one time I have a descent sex dream, I get awakened. Fuck. Shit. ...and the roomy didn't even go anywhere. He just went back to sleep. He wasted an alarm. I was awakened unnecessarily. Goddammit. I couldn't cuss enough to express my anger. I think that's why I had problems going back to sleep! I was just cussing and angry and shit...I just couldn't stop. So fuck. ....so fuck again. so fuck thrice. ¶12:11 PM e-mail me (0) comments Sunday, September 21, 2003 ...I'm feeling like crap. Well...not physically (although I do have a horrible headache). Well, it's sort of physical. I'm feeling like a teddy bear would feel if it was put in a box, and a 10 ton anvil fell on top of the box. That's about all I feel like saying right now. My weekend of endless privacy is officially over. It turns out that it wasn't as endless as I would like it to be. We (meaning my roommate and I) finally got the room considerably organized. We got the TV working, which means I'm not gonna get to play video games as much, seeing how my roommate is watching stuff on TV. That's okay...that's what the TV is for. I need to give a DVD back to a buddy of mine tonight...he let me borrow Animal House. Animal House was okay, but it wasn't funny. All weekend I play Halo with friend(s), and done some homework. It was very titillating. I think I'm gonna work on some Flash tonight. It's be long overdue for something to present to you people. Everything is still cool with my grades. Sort of. Well, let's just say I'm not totally confident with straight B's or higher. As all of you know, my goal was to be on the Dean's List. As of this moment, it's still my goal. Whether it's obtainable or not is another story. My Japanese classes are going smoother than ever. It's been great. I'm actually studying flash cards daily now. Suitemates are still mysterious beings that lurk. I don't really know any of their names (well 2 names). I have no desire what-so-ever to get to know those fuckers. Oh! Did I say fuckers, I meant freshmen. My bad. They're so retarded to me, along with other people. ¶7:23 PM e-mail me (0) comments Saturday, September 20, 2003 People...complete strangers...are always coming up to me and asking, "Keddaris, how much pizza do you eat?" Okay, that really doesn't happen. I usually eat pizza every other day. Is it healthy? Who knows. I just ordered pizza, (large pepperoni w/ cheesy bread). Am I sick of eating pizza? No. Do you care? Not really. DDRMAX 2 comes out next wednesday...I'm counting down the days before I get to step to 70 more songs in the DDR universe. I've been having my webcam running. I'm not sure if I want to add that to my site again because last time, freaky people would ask to see me naked (via e-mail). I just can't find any time to work on my Flash projects. I need a team. I need to assign certain task for each person to do, and then bring all of it together. I have ideas, but they're just too complex to finish within a months time at the moment. I've got friends back at home who may or may not be working on Flash things. We should all get together, and create something one day. Maybe next Summer. We could start a little Flash company thing (for no apparent reason). I've got the space for movies...currently, I've got about 160 MB I'm not using - yet, I'm still paying for it. ¶4:42 PM e-mail me (0) comments Friday, September 19, 2003 FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This weekend, I'm going to watch Animal House for the first time, watch Memento for the 4th time, Pulp Fiction for the 20th time, and the last 10 episodes of Futurama vol. 2. Roommate's supposedly going home, so that means fun fun motherfucking fun. Well, time to study for my vocabulary quiz. I'm making a freaking A this time; if I don't, I'm killing myself...figuratively speaking of course. ¶12:25 PM e-mail me (0) comments Wednesday, September 17, 2003 I'm pissed off, but I don't know why. I'm in one of my moods. We just had another fire alarm. I just had an 8-hour day. I'm pooped out, I'm annoyed...I can't possible be in a happy mood like everyone else apparently is. It's pissing me off that I'm not happy, it's pissing me off even more that everyone around me is happy. Fucking freshmen. Fucking...everyone. I'm not a happy camper. ¶10:29 PM e-mail me (0) comments "The unofficial sequel to The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker. Very few details are currently available for this anticipated project, but we do know that 1) it will use a cel-shaded look and feature young Link once more and 2) it's scheduled for release in 2004." - from IGN.com Wow...2004! Isn't that ...next year?! I can't fucking wait. I loved The Windwaker. The last boss was so fulfilling. Those of you who were upset with Majora's Mask last boss (me being one of you), Windwake's last boss(es) (I should say) were awesome. I wonder if this is going to be another spinoff quest like Majora's Mask, or will it be a brand new fully length Zelda quest (where Zelda gets taken, and Ganon is there and blah blah). That hold save-the-princess bit is getting old. Fortunately Nintendo is doing a good job keeping it fresh. Nintendo should do a spinoff story like all the Final Fantasies do, where Zelda goes from world to world and saves whatever. Anyway, I've got work to do...bye. ¶12:26 PM e-mail me (0) comments Tuesday, September 16, 2003 I hate it when I feel lazy. I need to go and get a haircut...but I don't feel like putting any clothes on (no, I'm not walking around here naked...although I wouldn't mind). I need to go get something to eat, but right now I'd rather sit and do nothing than go get food. I've got a class at 4, but I don't feel like going (it's the only class of the day). I'm really starting to hate being in this room, but I don't feel like going anywhere. I wish I didn't have to go anywhere. Okay...okay....ok. I not really bored, just lazy. WHY THE FUCK DO MY SUITEMATES HAVE TO ANNOUNCE EVERYTIME THEY'RE GONNA TAKE A SHIT? I'm sorry that's off topic, but everytime one of the is about to take a shit: "I'm gonna take a shit!" "Time to take a shit!" (just recently) "Time to do that nasty" What's the fucking purpose??? Just go in the bathroom and shut the door and take a shit. You don't have to announce it to the world. It's like they're expected some nasty reactions....and they want us to look up to them because of their honesty. Sure it's honestly, but it's just too much information for me to hear every 4-6 hours. Have I made an attempt.....okay, now they're blasting country music. Not modern country music (that's at least tolerable)....but classic country. That's absurd. Why? Isn't it so fucking ironic? They types of music you hate the most is the type of music you'll be the closest to. Last year, it was alternative 70s-inspired free-rock (it's hard trying to define hippy music). This year it's classic country. Complete with the out of tune vocals, and the suitemates trying to sing to them....so in term, it makes it even more out of tune. How fucked up is that?? Sure, I love diversity...I just hate noise. You feel me? I hope the answer is no, because I don't want you strangers touching all on me like a cheap manwhore. Because you better feel me up like an expensive manwhore. Anyway, back on the subject. I think I'm gonna order some delivery. You know, in order to stay in my pajamas for an extra 3 hours. I'll have to get a haircut Thursday, because tomorrow I've got classes for all day straight. It sucks, and at the end of the day I just want to relax. Wednesday is definite the worst day of the week for me. I really need to study, but I probably won't. Not until I made a horrible grade. So far, I'm making B's or higher. I don't really study at all...maybe an hour every other day. But I really need to make straight A's in order to keep my 3.1 GPA up. Dammit...I hate being ambitious. ¶12:21 PM e-mail me (0) comments Monday, September 15, 2003 Sorry I haven't been updated. I've been playing Stepmania.... Get It Here! ¶9:22 PM e-mail me (0) comments Thursday, September 11, 2003 I put a lot of DDR songs in my public folder, so check it out! Click on the link above if you didn't already figure that out. DDR SONGS PEOPLE!!! Get 'em while they are still in there. I got a lot of them from other people's sites, so search the net for the booty. ¶4:44 PM e-mail me (0) comments Oh yeah, today is Sept. 11th...didn't something tragic happen a couple of years ago on this day? Why am I feeling this huge amount of sympathy. Damn I hate George W. Bush. ¶4:33 PM e-mail me (0) comments I just got all the episodes of Cowboy Bebop today...I think. Each disc seems to contain 9 episodes. I can't wait until I see them all. I think I'll watch one episode a day. Too much of a good thing is too good - I won't be able to get enough. Anyway, it's time to study for this fucking Japanese quiz I have tomorrow. Then I have to do homework for my Discrete Math class; I don't even know how to do it, yet I have to turn it in tomorrow. How great. I'm off. ¶4:33 PM e-mail me (0) comments Tuesday, September 09, 2003 Woo Hoo! One of my friends is back online, so my core audience is back! I repeat: WOO HOO! I'm sitting here...my roommate and a friend are playing Zelda: The Windwaker. I've only got one class on Tuesdays (4 - 4:45PM), so it's going to be s-m-o-o-t-h today. Last night was great! I went to a faculty jazz concert. I saw all my music professors perform. I was amazed. Last year, I would always forget about going...I would hear from all the students who went about how great it was. Now I can be one of those students, buahahaha. Anyway, everything is cool. I'm still talking a lot, even when I don't want to. It's good practice. Whenever I don't want to say anything, and force things out I always ending up saying something that doesn't make any sense - or, I stutter like a motherfucker. But whatever, I'm learning. You know, there is no way I can organize what I write! Each sentence feels like the start of a new paragraph. I hate clowns. I've ate pizza 4 days in a row; whenever I play DDR, my heart hurts. I think I aced a Japanese quiz!!! I'm happy about that - I better have aced it, because I studied for hours and hours learning about 50 adjectives. Last Sunday, I went to someone's house and played Halo until 2AM with lots of people - if you didn't know, Sunday is before Monday, which is the day of the week when people go back to classes. I wasn't too sleepy the next day. Well, I think this ends yet another random unorganized post. Have a good fucking day. ¶12:46 PM e-mail me (0) comments Sunday, September 07, 2003 So looks like this is going to be another yesterday post. Yesterday, I was suppose to study...but I didn't do anything. I BEAT ZELDA: THE WINDWAKER!!!!!! It was amazing. The only hard thing about the boss fights were figuring out how to kill them. Ganon in his natural form kicked ass though! Very hard...not as hard as Ganon from Ocarina of Time, but hard nonetheless. I'm not gonna give anything away. Metroid Prime was still better...that final boss fight was semi-impossible at first - yet much more satisfying when you figure shit out. TODAY IS ALL ABOUT THE BENJAMINS, BABY. And by "BENJAMINS" I mean "studying." And by "studying" I mean "burning in HELL." And by "burning in HELL" I mean "taking 10,000 shits nonstop." Get the picture? ¶11:58 AM e-mail me (0) comments Saturday, September 06, 2003 Eh - Yesterday was pretty fun. "Why?" You ask? Because it was Friday of course. After my last class at 2:50 (nichi ji go-juppun desu), all hell broke loose...which is a good thing. Did I go party hopping until the wee hours of the morning? Nah. Did I meet up with some bitch and have sex for hours and hours? Nah (not yet). All I did was chill in my room, and talk to my roommate and another. We watched a little Seinfield, played a little XBox, talked a little more, and topped it of with a pizza from Papa Johns. All the freshmen in the building were either still in the dorm getting wasted, or out somewhere getting wasted. Okay, my bad - I really shouldn't say "all" ...more like most. I witnessed the getting-wasting firsthand. Funny shit it was. Dumb freshmen some are. There were multiple pukings all over the place...it would suck to be a toilet one Friday/Saturday night. Today will probably be more of the same. I need to study Japanese, do some Discrete Math, and practice converting binary to hexadecimal and back. That'll probably equal about 5 hours of work. I should do it today so my Sunday will be very laid back and worry free. I went to sleep last night at 4:10AM. Oh yes...that's late - or is it? (buahahaha) I woke up at 11:30AM, so i got my 7 hours. I'm pumped and ready for yet another beautifully, rainy day. Fucking hurricanes with their forceful winds and downpours. I wish they'd all burn in hell (w/ Hitler and the Teletubbies). We had a minor earthquake last week; however, few felt it. It scared the hell of of me, so that's all that matters. Anyway, later. ¶12:51 PM e-mail me (0) comments Friday, September 05, 2003 Oh yes. Today is Friday. I swear - by the end of the week, I'm so out of it. I stop speaking to people, I stop playing video games, I stop having any type of fun. I just get so focused on my homework assignments; there's just so much pressure I've put on myself. I want to at least make straight A's this semester. It's just a extremely high goal that I set for myself...will I accomplish that? Probably not. Japanese isn't extremely hard, but it looks like I'm gonna make yet another B. At least I'm at ease with myself. I'm not concerned with how people perceive me, I'm not concerned with people at all. College for me is all about the education, and preparing for a highly lucrative career - that's it. I've got enough friends and family to fill my need-to-socialize gap, so why should I obtain more? Sure that's subjective, but what in the world isn't these days? Dammit...I just felt like writing that. It makes me feel good. ¶9:51 AM e-mail me (0) comments Wednesday, September 03, 2003 All of the music groups I'll be in this semester include: Pep Band, Big Band, and Orchestra. It's gonna be a lot of fun. All of my fellow boners from last year are still in it, so we're gonna have a good 'ol time. I haven't forgotten how to play of course. I'm still considered a Trombone God by all (or at least in my own little world). My goal is to be the best trombone player at the College of Charleston...with enough practice, I'm sure that can be arranged. I'm already the best rhythmic-wise, all I need to work on is my range as usual. No biggie. The only thing about my roommate that semi-annoys me is how he takes naps during the day. That being the exception, I couldn't have picked a better roommate (partly because anyone who was better were unknown to me). As far as the basics are concerned (favorite type of music, favorite shows, etc), we're pretty much the same. When you get down and gritty, you'll find that there's more contradiction (Nintendo vs. PS2, PC vs. Mac, Smoking vs. Non-Smoking, Excessive Talker vs. Conservative Talker, Spider-Man vs. Green Lantern, Stay-up-late/Sleep-late vs. Stay-up-late/Sleep-sporadically-throughout-day, Studying Japanese vs. Studying Latin, DDR-lover vs. DDR-hater(?) ...I can go on and on). We share the same morality, yet act differently in any given scenario. I'm sure we would make a good scientific study one day. I'm talking to lots of people, more than usual. Overall, my mood is a lot less depressed and more flamboyant. I'm avoiding any extra attention from people like usual, but I'll always be like that. I feel like I'm an easier person to talk to. I haven't been walking around campus with my headphones on - I'm not blocking the world out, I'm beginning to embrace it. It made me feel so anti-everything when I would walk around the campus wearing headphones. I look around, and I'm noticing that not a lot of people do that. My year has started off to a great start - I hope it'll stay like that. Classes are easy. Japanese is easy. Everything. I'm a happier person in the long run. Is that a change for a good? Who knows. I know that I'm not as gullible as last year. I finally feel as if I've got an adequate amount of common sense. Hopefully, it'll stay like that. Really, the only bad thing to happen is that I think I lost my mailbox key. I might be able to find it...who knows. I orders Microsoft Word and Finale 2003/2004; it cost me about $400 total (it would have normally cost me about $800, but I got a huge student discount). Yesterday I bought Desperado - it's officially my favorite action movie (of course all the Matrix movies are on top, but you know what I mean). Well, I've got Pep Band rehearsal at 5PM. Now that I'm in a new dorm called McConnell, it takes an extra 5 minutes to get from place to place (by foot). That a lot compared to when I was living in College Lodge (under 1 minute for the most part). Later. ¶4:52 PM e-mail me (0) comments Tuesday, September 02, 2003  We give you a month tops, after which you'll be a complete ddr burnout and will have sworn off the game totally, or you will be your local arcade's Cata Maestro. Are you overly obsessed with Dance Dance Revolution? Created by ptocheia ¶12:51 AM e-mail me (0) comments Monday, September 01, 2003 Tick tock. Last night, I played Halo until 1AM. 3 Friends and myself were just killing each other over and over again. Very fun. I swear, Halo is more addictive than crack (and don't ask me how I know that). I'm kicking ass in Japanese 102, which is unusual. CSCI 250 is easy. Discrete Math 207 is easy. Looks like I'm making straight A's this semester. Woo Hoo. Since I kinda started talking about my addictions...my addiction to Mellow Yellow is once again in full effect. Also, my addiction to Pizza. I bought Finale 2003 for under $200 yesterday. It's required software for my Music Composition class. Speaking of composition, I really should start creating a song. Nothing special is happening. Last weekend, I went "shopping" with some people. I found a DDR machine. Have I already wrote about that? 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